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As a speech language pathologist I spend my days welcoming into my office little people, most under 3 ft tall and their parents as they come to their weekly auditory verbal therapy session. These wonderful dedicated parents travel each week, some for many miles to learn to teach their hearing impaired child to listen and talk. With the technology we have today this is a daily event, children learning to listen and talk. It is hard work for these parents. It takes patience, courage, perseverance, and a bit of grit. You know that edge that helps you over the humps?
Today was no exception, children were welcomed at the waiting room door and most of them now give me the biggest smile and call out my name as if they can't wait to see what I am going to have for them this time. These brave parents follow them back, most of the time with a smile, sometimes with a weariness from the daily grind but always eager to share and learn.
The most special of days is when a child who has not heard suddenly through hearing aids or cochlear implants can now hear. That is a banner day for these parents. While they are anxious, they are also grateful.
Today I saw a young child on his second day after cochlear implant activation. There were noticeable differences in his communication, he was hearing us and responding well. I thought to myself, he is going to be a listener.
After some reflection about listening, I realized that is what I would like for people to say about me. She is a listener. My isn't talking so much easier. Our brains just think of what to say...or not...and out come the words. But to listen, now that is a gift we can give so many others.
What does it take to be an active listener? Paying attention, showing you are listening, providing feedback to make sure you are understanding, deferring judgement until we can clarify, then responding accordingly with respect and care. Sounds easy! Most of us think we are listeners.
I am grateful today that I have friends who remind me to listen more closely, expect me to listen openly, and listen to me when I need an ear. Bless these precious children also, who are learning to do just that!
Thursday, May 27, 2010
Wednesday, May 26, 2010
How To Be A Blessing
One of my favorite books is called "The Blessing" by Smalley and Trent. It is grounded in the custom from the Hebrew tradition that the father at some specific and special time in a child's life would intentionally and with the greatest depth of feeling give the child a spoken message..a blessing. I have always seen this as an ultimate act of expression of love and encouragement. We all want to hear words of affirmation, acceptance, and love and when we do we tend to grown into healthier adults. We tend to be adults who can in turn have healthy and close relationships.
According to Smalley and Trent, "The Blessing" has five elements. A blessing must include a spoken message, attach high value, picture a special future, include an active commitment to see that the words lead to actions and must always include meaningful touch.
The tradition of giving the blessing is still a part of the Jewish tradition. In today's world I think it is even more critical now that children receive this blessing and not just on one occasion but seamlessly as a part of family life regardless of ones religious faith. Taken another step further I love the idea that anyone, no matter their age, can give another person a blessing.
Parent to child, child to parent , spouse to spouse, co-worker to boss, boss to co-worker, friend to friend, neighbor to neighbor. There are endless pairs of relationships in which the gift of a blessing could only enhance the relationship or lift another person up. I challenge us to think about the words of blessing we have received in our lives, be grateful for them and to pay them forward by speaking them to another often. Smalley and Trent offer great help if a person has somehow regretfully missed out on The Blessing.
Complete the circle, continue the circle and give and give and give those blessing words away. You will never regret them.
Living Gratefully....one blessing at a time.
Tuesday, May 25, 2010
Taking Another Road...And Back
My hiatus from blogging gave me the opportunity to complete many other projects that have become valuable both personally and professionally. Yet there is so much to miss, especially the wonderful words of blog friends who have continued their dedication to their blogs.
I've been thinking about how refreshing it is to start something new. I've been grant writing, project managing, and planning and organizing. All things that I find I do well. The challenges have been many. Time management. Setting and meeting deadlines. Working cooperatively with others. Encouraging others and meeting fear head on. Fear can get the best of you when trying something new but if you can press on toward your goal you will find that there are so many gifts along the way.
Of course, there is also loss when trying something new. Giving up something well loved in order to find out what you are made of. That untraveled path at first does not seem near as smooth as the one you have been on. That comfortable road that you could walk easily. Dare you leave it and go another way?
The good news, and there is good news and that is that when you come back to the familiar, like blogging you just pick up where you left off, no rules. Your fingers fit nicely on the key board and there is much more to say because you've been on that new traveled road. And you really don't mind if you are the only one around.
Hello my comfortable blog. It's me, maybe a bit tired but also refreshed. Different for having stepped back and worked on new goals. And still thinking abundantly and still grateful for all that I have. What a blessing!
Wednesday, January 27, 2010
Zig and Zag
At least there is warning. I like warnings. I am a faithful weather watcher. I like to be prepared. I like to know what is coming. However, in my effort to life gratefully I am also focusing on getting more comfortable with "seeing what happens", "going with the flow" "living in the moment" and "embracing spontaneity". This next event could just be an opportunity to practice.
Even with weather forcasts and radar capabilities, we still do not know what is really in store for us on Thursday. Maybe ice, maybe snow...maybe both. I do know that there will be an opportunity to zig and zag my way through. Whether in travel to and from work, dealing with a power outage or finding ways to occupy my time while snowed in, I will remind myself to adjust, adapt, and be aware that honing this skill might be of course my "planned spontaneity". :)
Living Gratefully is ...being thankful when the zig and zag opportunities come your way!
Sunday, January 3, 2010
I'm Looking Around
So this morning I started the list. I started with the living room...and moving mentally through each room noticed areas and items of neglect. I made a list of needs and a few wants that would improve our visual space but also the efficiency with which we go through our year. Nothing earth shattering but with a little attention I can plan how to make the changes. I can wait for sales, plan how to use my coupons and economically make the changes.
One example; we are down to two good pot holders. An object that I do not care in the least about but one that is necessary if you want to avoid scorched body parts. You get the idea. I am usually thinking big picture and assign more importance to improving my personal qualities rather that my possessions.
So, now I am more aware..the first step toward taking action. Now where is that coupon section of my Sunday paper?
Friday, January 1, 2010
New Year...New Word for 2010
Abundance was the word that prompted me to begin this blog and it has carried me through faithfully.
My WORD for 2010 is "Gratitude". I'll begin a daily gratitude journal and through the act of gratitude hope to hold back other words that creep into my consciousness....anger, regret, judgement, worry.
The road map from abundance to gratitude came to me through Sarah Ban Breathnack, of Simple Abundance Online. She writes,“Whatever we are waiting for – peace of mind, contentment, grace, the inner awareness of simple abundance – it will surely come to us, but only when we are ready to receive it with an open and grateful heart.”
I pray for an open and grateful heart as I continue my journey in 2010.
Today I am grateful for ....A Day of Rest.
Thursday, December 31, 2009
Reflections on our Word: Year End
January 1, 2009, I made a commitment with my blog friends, post each month about one WORD for the year. I chose ABUNDANCE.
In the beginning, I had been blogging regularly, receiving inspiration from other blogs, and sharing my blogging with close friends. I had already quoted scriptures that speak of Abundance. I understood that God wants abundance for us and wants us to recognize the abundance we already have no matter our situation. In January, for the first post I said this; “How will a WORD impact the way I am living? How will this one WORD teach me, challenge me, make me want to be a better person?”
Well, my commitment to this WORD saved me from myself. When I was depleted of spirit, I was reminded. When I was depleted of funds, I was reminded. When I was depleted of love of others, of love of self, of discipline, of faith, of balance and of excellence, I was reminded. I was reminded of my abundance every month by the words of this blog group. I was encouraged by their words and I was inspired to give more. I had abundance.
I learned that if you hold fast…keep moving…keep living…and keep giving, you will have enough. You will have abundance in your life. God promised it and even without faith we will have it. Faith just makes it better.
Mitch Album says “The way you get meaning into your life is to devote yourself to loving others, devote yourself to your community around you, and devote yourself to creating something that gives you purpose and meaning.” I could say the way you get Abundance is the same….
I cannot say it any more clearly than the acrostic that I posted in January: Abundance is a verb. It is an act of life that requires one to move…to do, in order to become.
Aone for your hurtfulness.
Bid farewell to judgment.
Utilize your mind.
Notice your surroundings.
Draw on support from friends.
Acknowledge the gifts of others.
Nullify negativity.
Create moments of meaning.
Embrace the little things
I am looking forward to 2010. My word for 2010 is Gratefulness. Again I say, ““How will the WORD impact the way I am living? How will this one WORD teach me, challenge me, make me want to be a better person?” Come along with me those who will and commit to another WORD for your year.
Here are the reflections of my blog friends Peggy, Annemarie, Roban and Julie as we end our year with Balance, Discipline, Faith and Joy, and Excellence.
Peggy of Middle Age Ramblings
This post is our final reflection on our words for 2009. I chose the word BALANCE because I hoped it would empower me to leave my unbalanced life behind in 2008. Overall it actually helped in the most simple of ways. That is, when I was feeling quite stressed out throughout the year, I would, now and then, remember, "oh yeah – balance" and take a few deep breaths.
Today's reflection is about spirituality:
The philosophy of balance can be found in many of the world’s religions, particularly the eastern religions. In both Hinduism and Taoism, the idea of balancing your mind, body and spirit is very important.
In Hinduism it is believed that the body is made up of seven basic "chakras" or energy centers, each of which correlates to different bodily functions, levels of consciousness, emotional states and so on. In order to stay healthy, we need to ensure that these chakras remain balanced.
Similarly in Taoism, there is the concept of "chi", which is the vital energy that flows through the body. In traditional Chinese medicine, it is believed that illness is caused by imbalances of yin and yang in the body, which blocks the free movement of "chi". Thus, to stay healthy you need to maintain the balance between yin and yang in your body.
In western culture, a commonly heard phrase is "healthy mind, healthy body", which encourages balance between mental and physical health. Having a healthy mind and body, however, is only a part of the story. As suggested by the following Taoist quote, we also need to bring our spiritual selves into balance:
"Unless the mind, body and spirit are equally developed and fully integrated, no [wisdom] can be sustained".
AnneMarie of "So I Was Just Thinking"
"Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us. Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before him endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. Consider him who endured such opposition from sinful men, so that you will not grow weary and lose heart. " (NIV) Hebrews 12:1-3
This is the last edition of my monthly reflections on the word Discipline. My friends and I started on our respective journeys twelve months ago after reading Caroline’s post having no idea where the road would take us. It has been wonderful trip.
I chose the word discipline to inspire, motivate and direct me through the year. It was a good thing to aspire to but one that I will probably never fully achieve. When I finally came to that realization, I finally felt more relaxed. The point was to reach for that goal with PERSEVERANCE. I fixed my eyes on Jesus who helped me to remain steadfast because knowing I could do all things through Christ who strengthens me. (Philippians 4:13)
So as I endured difficult times, those words carried me through. My goal was not to be the perfect parent or the perfect teacher, but be more planned and organized in both of these areas.
I haven’t exactly decided what my focus is for next year, but I am certain it will involve creativity of some sort. So don’t “lose heart,” I will be back with another series of posts.
Roban of "Moments In Time"
365 days... 52 weeks... 12 months...
That's how long it's been since Peggy, Annemarie, Wendy, Julie, and I first posted about the words we chose to focus on during 2009. During these months, we forged friendships together as we shared our individual journeys with one another.
Although I chose to focus on FAITH and JOY this year, I must say that I learned as much from my friends' words as I did my own. Balance, discipline, abundance, and excellence made their way into my own life as I read their monthly posts or looked at the photographs and other images that helped them tell their stories. I often found myself contemplating their words alongside my own.
When I chose faith and joy, I could already see a connection between the two... that by having more faith in God and in His plan for my life, I will be able to experience more joy in the daily moments that make up my life. I shared my words with my students and made it a point to think about the words as the days and weeks rolled past.
How did I do? I think in the beginning, I was more attuned to the words and what I wanted them to mean in my life. As the months passed, however, I found myself slipping into old habits of worry. Yet, in the middle of the day or during the evening at home, I would stop and really look at the world around me. And I would smile. Joy, I realized, is all around me if I open my eyes wide enough to see.
God wants each of us to be happy... to experience joy in our life each and every day. Why else would He send beautiful rays of pink and orange to greet us each morning? Why would the sounds of nature, from birds' songs to the crashing of ocean waves, soothe our souls? Why would He bless the earth with children whose carefree laughter is a clear invitation for us to experience joy?
He gives us these bursts of color and song as a gift so that we will know joy.
Julie of "Octamom"
What an interesting discipline, this practice of choosing and focusing on a guiding word for the year. It has been a blessing and touchstone throughout '09 to meditate on the facets of excellence as my blog buddies and I have traveled this rotation.
In choosing excellence as my word for 2009, I was expressing a heart's cry to 'come up' in various areas of my life. Because I'm in the business of raising many children, I am also in the business of managing people's expectations. Some folks have very minimal expectations of me, assuming that I am too busy, too distracted to contribute in other areas. Some expect that I must be some kind of 'super mom' and figure I'm the one to call on for any kid-related project.
And the reality is different.
It is focusing on excellence that helps me see what I need to be doing in my day to day life and what needs to be taken to the curb. I can't do it all excellently and there are areas where it is acceptable to me to do simple 'maintenance'. But in those areas I feel the Lord is calling me to serve, a plumb line for me to determine if I am walking where He is leading is to discern the caliber of contribution I am making. And when something comes along that is a good thing but is something that shouldn't be on my plate, holding it up to the light and seeing if it is something that could be accomplished with excellence makes it easier to put down when I see it is something that cannot be done to that level in my present season. Excellence can be defining.
I am so thankful to be on my journey with like-minded people, believers who have let go of legalism and are embracing the miracle of grace. And somehow in the doing, they are also continuing to walk with excellence, not out of a sense of fear or obligation, but out of a grateful heart, wanting to bring their best for the King. Where I set my standards for myself, the level of character I expect from myself, are all outpourings of my desire to please Him, an expression of His in-dwelling.
Has this beacon of excellence been a tool this year? Absolutely. Have I 'achieved' excellence in all the areas I would have liked to? Absolutely not. And that is the purpose of these defining words, to create a philosophy, a guide for our varying paths. Clarity has come this year through this term of excellence, clarity in areas that need more work, clarity in what needs to laid down, clarity in what areas have been refined and may have something to offer.
Excellence.
And the journey continues.
In the beginning, I had been blogging regularly, receiving inspiration from other blogs, and sharing my blogging with close friends. I had already quoted scriptures that speak of Abundance. I understood that God wants abundance for us and wants us to recognize the abundance we already have no matter our situation. In January, for the first post I said this; “How will a WORD impact the way I am living? How will this one WORD teach me, challenge me, make me want to be a better person?”
Well, my commitment to this WORD saved me from myself. When I was depleted of spirit, I was reminded. When I was depleted of funds, I was reminded. When I was depleted of love of others, of love of self, of discipline, of faith, of balance and of excellence, I was reminded. I was reminded of my abundance every month by the words of this blog group. I was encouraged by their words and I was inspired to give more. I had abundance.
I learned that if you hold fast…keep moving…keep living…and keep giving, you will have enough. You will have abundance in your life. God promised it and even without faith we will have it. Faith just makes it better.
Mitch Album says “The way you get meaning into your life is to devote yourself to loving others, devote yourself to your community around you, and devote yourself to creating something that gives you purpose and meaning.” I could say the way you get Abundance is the same….
I cannot say it any more clearly than the acrostic that I posted in January: Abundance is a verb. It is an act of life that requires one to move…to do, in order to become.
Aone for your hurtfulness.
Bid farewell to judgment.
Utilize your mind.
Notice your surroundings.
Draw on support from friends.
Acknowledge the gifts of others.
Nullify negativity.
Create moments of meaning.
Embrace the little things
I am looking forward to 2010. My word for 2010 is Gratefulness. Again I say, ““How will the WORD impact the way I am living? How will this one WORD teach me, challenge me, make me want to be a better person?” Come along with me those who will and commit to another WORD for your year.
Here are the reflections of my blog friends Peggy, Annemarie, Roban and Julie as we end our year with Balance, Discipline, Faith and Joy, and Excellence.
Peggy of Middle Age Ramblings
This post is our final reflection on our words for 2009. I chose the word BALANCE because I hoped it would empower me to leave my unbalanced life behind in 2008. Overall it actually helped in the most simple of ways. That is, when I was feeling quite stressed out throughout the year, I would, now and then, remember, "oh yeah – balance" and take a few deep breaths.
Today's reflection is about spirituality:
The philosophy of balance can be found in many of the world’s religions, particularly the eastern religions. In both Hinduism and Taoism, the idea of balancing your mind, body and spirit is very important.
In Hinduism it is believed that the body is made up of seven basic "chakras" or energy centers, each of which correlates to different bodily functions, levels of consciousness, emotional states and so on. In order to stay healthy, we need to ensure that these chakras remain balanced.
Similarly in Taoism, there is the concept of "chi", which is the vital energy that flows through the body. In traditional Chinese medicine, it is believed that illness is caused by imbalances of yin and yang in the body, which blocks the free movement of "chi". Thus, to stay healthy you need to maintain the balance between yin and yang in your body.
In western culture, a commonly heard phrase is "healthy mind, healthy body", which encourages balance between mental and physical health. Having a healthy mind and body, however, is only a part of the story. As suggested by the following Taoist quote, we also need to bring our spiritual selves into balance:
"Unless the mind, body and spirit are equally developed and fully integrated, no [wisdom] can be sustained".
AnneMarie of "So I Was Just Thinking"
"Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us. Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before him endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. Consider him who endured such opposition from sinful men, so that you will not grow weary and lose heart. " (NIV) Hebrews 12:1-3
This is the last edition of my monthly reflections on the word Discipline. My friends and I started on our respective journeys twelve months ago after reading Caroline’s post having no idea where the road would take us. It has been wonderful trip.
I chose the word discipline to inspire, motivate and direct me through the year. It was a good thing to aspire to but one that I will probably never fully achieve. When I finally came to that realization, I finally felt more relaxed. The point was to reach for that goal with PERSEVERANCE. I fixed my eyes on Jesus who helped me to remain steadfast because knowing I could do all things through Christ who strengthens me. (Philippians 4:13)
So as I endured difficult times, those words carried me through. My goal was not to be the perfect parent or the perfect teacher, but be more planned and organized in both of these areas.
I haven’t exactly decided what my focus is for next year, but I am certain it will involve creativity of some sort. So don’t “lose heart,” I will be back with another series of posts.
Roban of "Moments In Time"
365 days... 52 weeks... 12 months...
That's how long it's been since Peggy, Annemarie, Wendy, Julie, and I first posted about the words we chose to focus on during 2009. During these months, we forged friendships together as we shared our individual journeys with one another.
Although I chose to focus on FAITH and JOY this year, I must say that I learned as much from my friends' words as I did my own. Balance, discipline, abundance, and excellence made their way into my own life as I read their monthly posts or looked at the photographs and other images that helped them tell their stories. I often found myself contemplating their words alongside my own.
When I chose faith and joy, I could already see a connection between the two... that by having more faith in God and in His plan for my life, I will be able to experience more joy in the daily moments that make up my life. I shared my words with my students and made it a point to think about the words as the days and weeks rolled past.
How did I do? I think in the beginning, I was more attuned to the words and what I wanted them to mean in my life. As the months passed, however, I found myself slipping into old habits of worry. Yet, in the middle of the day or during the evening at home, I would stop and really look at the world around me. And I would smile. Joy, I realized, is all around me if I open my eyes wide enough to see.
God wants each of us to be happy... to experience joy in our life each and every day. Why else would He send beautiful rays of pink and orange to greet us each morning? Why would the sounds of nature, from birds' songs to the crashing of ocean waves, soothe our souls? Why would He bless the earth with children whose carefree laughter is a clear invitation for us to experience joy?
He gives us these bursts of color and song as a gift so that we will know joy.
Julie of "Octamom"
What an interesting discipline, this practice of choosing and focusing on a guiding word for the year. It has been a blessing and touchstone throughout '09 to meditate on the facets of excellence as my blog buddies and I have traveled this rotation.
In choosing excellence as my word for 2009, I was expressing a heart's cry to 'come up' in various areas of my life. Because I'm in the business of raising many children, I am also in the business of managing people's expectations. Some folks have very minimal expectations of me, assuming that I am too busy, too distracted to contribute in other areas. Some expect that I must be some kind of 'super mom' and figure I'm the one to call on for any kid-related project.
And the reality is different.
It is focusing on excellence that helps me see what I need to be doing in my day to day life and what needs to be taken to the curb. I can't do it all excellently and there are areas where it is acceptable to me to do simple 'maintenance'. But in those areas I feel the Lord is calling me to serve, a plumb line for me to determine if I am walking where He is leading is to discern the caliber of contribution I am making. And when something comes along that is a good thing but is something that shouldn't be on my plate, holding it up to the light and seeing if it is something that could be accomplished with excellence makes it easier to put down when I see it is something that cannot be done to that level in my present season. Excellence can be defining.
I am so thankful to be on my journey with like-minded people, believers who have let go of legalism and are embracing the miracle of grace. And somehow in the doing, they are also continuing to walk with excellence, not out of a sense of fear or obligation, but out of a grateful heart, wanting to bring their best for the King. Where I set my standards for myself, the level of character I expect from myself, are all outpourings of my desire to please Him, an expression of His in-dwelling.
Has this beacon of excellence been a tool this year? Absolutely. Have I 'achieved' excellence in all the areas I would have liked to? Absolutely not. And that is the purpose of these defining words, to create a philosophy, a guide for our varying paths. Clarity has come this year through this term of excellence, clarity in areas that need more work, clarity in what needs to laid down, clarity in what areas have been refined and may have something to offer.
Excellence.
And the journey continues.
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